4 Mindsets for Resilience, Gratitude, Openness & Compassion
Some setbacks are unavoidable, but how much they throw you off course often comes down to attitude. Four mindsets, resilience, gratitude, openness and compassion, do a lot of the work when it comes to handling difficulty without it tipping into something worse.
Resilience
Resilience is the ability to recover from a setback and carry on, ideally having learned something from it along the way. It tends to grow through practice rather than through positive thinking alone: facing a difficulty, getting through it, and noticing afterwards that you managed.
One way to practise it: after something goes wrong, write down one thing you handled and one thing you learned. Over time this builds evidence that you cope better than you expect to.
Gratitude
Gratitude means noticing what is actually going well, rather than only what is missing. A regular habit of doing this, even briefly, tends to improve mood and relationships over time, simply by shifting where your attention defaults to.
One way to practise it: note two or three specific good things at the end of each day. Specific beats general — “the swell finally picked up” rather than “a nice day”.
Openness
Openness means staying willing to take in new information and change your mind when it warrants it. It makes problem-solving easier, since most solutions come from seeing a situation slightly differently rather than trying harder at the same approach.
One way to practise it: when you are sure you are right, ask what would have to be true for the other view to make sense. It is a quick way to loosen a fixed position.
Compassion
Compassion means extending the same understanding to other people, and to yourself, that you would want in a difficult moment. It tends to make relationships steadier and, over time, makes setbacks feel less personal.
One way to practise it: when you catch harsh self-talk, ask how you would speak to a friend in the same spot, and use those words instead.
Putting these into practice
A reasonable starting point is deciding, in advance, to default to these four when things go wrong, rather than waiting to see how you feel in the moment. Journaling or meditation are useful ways to reinforce them day to day, and having a few people around you who share the same approach helps more than most people expect.
The benefits
Practising these four consistently tends to bring:
- Better emotional regulation in difficult moments
- Steadier relationships
- Sharper problem-solving
- More personal growth over time
How these mindsets come up on retreat
These four show up most in the wellness side of a retreat week — guided meditation and journaling sessions led by Captain Bingo. Surfing reinforces them too: a wipeout and a paddle back out is resilience in miniature, repeated until it feels normal.
Frequently asked questions
How do I actually practise gratitude?
The simplest method is to write down two or three specific things that went well each day. Specific beats general.
Can journaling build these mindsets?
Yes. Writing regularly makes you notice your own patterns, which is the first step to choosing a steadier response.
Which mindset should I start with?
Gratitude is the easiest entry point — it’s quick, needs no special conditions, and tends to make the other three easier.
Conclusion
None of these four mindsets are complicated on their own; the difficulty is remembering to use them when something has actually gone wrong. They come up often during journaling sessions as part of the wellness side of retreat weeks with Uluwatu Surf & Yoga Retreats, guided by our retreat leader. Reserve your spot on an upcoming week.
About the author
Written and taught by Captain Bingo (ERYT500), who leads all yoga, breathwork, meditation, and wellness sessions at Uluwatu Surf & Yoga Retreats and has taught internationally for more than 30 years. Meet Captain Bingo.